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Question
Posted by: Therese | 2010-05-04

sexual obsession

Please help me, my boyfriend is obsessing with the idea of swinging, same room sex, giving other men -|- s, watching porn - including she-males which he finds very stimulating , surfing swinger sites - I am in NO WAY prude, very sexually liberated and up for most things, but something about this is bothering me, can not pinpoint it. he is constantly looking for couples / singles to meet - get very angry if I don''t go along with the idea. it was fun in the beginning, both having a very healthy sexual appetite, but somewhere along the line it became an obsession for him. he accuses me of being a tease, having mislead me about my willingness to take part in swinging etc. Before I met him, I had no problem with the idea, but the more he pushes for it, the more I don''t want to participate. He is not gay, bi probably, but I can not see myself with someone who has an obsession with it.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Your position is valid, as is his. It looks as if your positions are no longer compatible. This doesn't mean that you mislead him, you have changed your mind now and that is fair enough. It sometimes happens that when people in a relationship differ on something which at least one of the people consider to be what I call a 'show stopper' or a 'non-negotiable', then they may decide to part company. If he is indeed 'obsessed' it may be that is more for him than just sex, certain obsessions can be damaging on a number of levels.

Claire
SASHA

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

5
Our users say:
Posted by: Sexologist | 2010-05-05

Your position is valid, as is his. It looks as if your positions are no longer compatible. This doesn't mean that you mislead him, you have changed your mind now and that is fair enough. It sometimes happens that when people in a relationship differ on something which at least one of the people consider to be what I call a 'show stopper' or a 'non-negotiable', then they may decide to part company. If he is indeed 'obsessed' it may be that is more for him than just sex, certain obsessions can be damaging on a number of levels.

Claire
SASHA

Reply to Sexologist
Posted by: Oldster | 2010-05-04

I can see how these things develop. It starts off being exciting and liberating, but then suddenly it turns rather dark and menacing. Take the advice given and make a break. This sort of thing can end up with someone getting killed or injured while trying to achiev e the ultimate high. Make a break.

Reply to Oldster
Posted by: Oldster | 2010-05-04

I can see how these things develop. It starts off being exciting and liberating, but then suddenly it turns rather dark and menacing. Take the advice given and make a break. This sort of thing can end up with someone getting killed or injured while trying to achiev e the ultimate high. Make a break.

Reply to Oldster
Posted by: XXX | 2010-05-04

He has a problem with this obsession and quite frankly,if you are not into it as well,then you need to consider splitting (if he won''t change).
A healthy sexual appetite is one thing but this is something else.
You need to be very concerned about the nasty diseases out there as well.

Reply to XXX
Posted by: JJ | 2010-05-04

Run u are not cheap

Reply to JJ

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