Our expert says:
No. Some people seem surprisingly resilient and show hardly any signs of childhood abuse ( though they of course do remember that it happened - the sort of amnesia for such events claimed in profitable books, is actually rare ). And the various checklists of symptoms or signs of earlier childhood abuse are without a single exception, hogwash. Yes, of course, many people are adversely affected by such experiences, but in a wide range of ways, and no single combination of symptoms is characteristic of earlier abuse o limited to it - the symptoms seen in a previously abused person are also seen in people who were never abused at all.
And some of the "checklists" are mischievous and harmful, where they list extremely common symptoms, leading normal, unabused people to believe that they must somehow have been abused though they have no recollection of such events.
The single best predictor of earlier childhood abuse is that you remember that this happened - usually not in great detail. And also in one's earliest years, when, sadly, some abuse occurs, one is not yet capable for forming memories which can later be remembered.
There are many reasons to have an unhappy sex life, and many reasons for not wanting sex with one's husband. The enormous majority of people who feel that way, have NOT been abused.
What would help most, would be for you to carefully avoid seeing and psuchotherapist who is specially interested in survivors of child abuse ( because too many of them are so busy grinding their own axes that they may not attend properly to your own particular circumstances and needs ) but to see a skilled and experienced general psychotherapist for a proper open-minded assessment, and therapy to clarify why you have these feelings of aversion to sex, and to help you overcome these to be free to enjoy yourself sexually.
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