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Question
Posted by: angel | 2010/01/19

Sexless marriage

27 yrs old, hubby 31 , married 7 years , he has cheated before with colleague, since then sex life went down , now no-existent, last time had sex was in March 2009. He does initiate sex, does not want to talk about it, he once said he had ED, pls he was -|- ing 2 women at once and now he has a problem, what do i do, cause i feel enough is enough.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

This sounds quite complex and requires a fuller understanding. The long and the short of it is that he needs to be willing to come to the party to discuss what is going on from his side. The only option you have in the absence of him addressing the sexual aspect, it to think about how important this aspect is in your life, and also about his approach to it/you and whether you are prepared to continue as is...

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Our users say:
Posted by: Sexologist | 2010/01/24

This sounds quite complex and requires a fuller understanding. The long and the short of it is that he needs to be willing to come to the party to discuss what is going on from his side. The only option you have in the absence of him addressing the sexual aspect, it to think about how important this aspect is in your life, and also about his approach to it/you and whether you are prepared to continue as is...

Reply to Sexologist
Posted by: XXX | 2010/01/22

I get so angry with men and women that withold sex in a marriage,for whatever reason.This guy is probably getting it somewhere else as it is simply not natural.He is also exposing you to diseases,so think hard about the future with this loser.
I can promise you,there are many men out there that would love to bonk you.

Reply to XXX
Posted by: Angel | 2010/01/21

I dont knw why he cheated, I just had my son, that was 5 yrs ago. Only the following year did I find out that he was cheating from a week after I delivered. It only ended 10 months later. Now I feel I shud get it somewhere else, after I leave. And correction if sex was 10 times more impt to a man then why hve we not had sex for almost a year.

Reply to Angel
Posted by: Christiaan | 2010/01/21

Ask yourself the question "  Why did he cheat on you?"  I mean if he where happy at home he would never gone seek it elsewhere. I cheated on my wive, but after 11years of sexless marriage I couldn' t take it and got it elsewhere. Bottom line is that sex is 10 times more important to men than to women.

Reply to Christiaan
Posted by: Adviser | 2010/01/19

You must leave him. Cheating is O.U.T. No second chances no " Im sorry"  Its too risky these days where people who are whacking each other on the sly do not really know who else has been there and then they bring it home to you. I would also stop any physical relations immediately. Accept the fact your so called marriage is OVER. Get maintenance and all you can out of him (get a woman lawyer) and start again. Its the only solution my girl.

Reply to Adviser
Posted by: rock | 2010/01/19

why still bother. ive been in the same boat with my wife..lets chat. contact me at rough1tough1 aattt hooottmmaail

Reply to rock
Posted by: Vrye Denker | 2010/01/19

You need to discuss this matter. If you are both willing to work on the marriage, then you need to lose all the baggage and start over.

Reply to Vrye Denker
Posted by: anon | 2010/01/19

Chances are he' s still cheating, only a small percentage of people who mess around stop, I hope for your sake he is one who will, you need to ask yourself if you are happy to stay with someone who has already cheated on you, and probably will continue to, even if you love him or have kids, is that what you want? I talk from experience I went through the same as you are, I can' t say leave him because he has cheated, but it' s important to know the odds, my ex wife cheated on me with someone at the office, I found out from his wife, turns out he had done this numerous times, this lead to his second divorce due to messing around, after getting divorced my ex and this guy become a couple although never married and now she has just broken up with him after 5 years because she has already caught him out twice cheating on her, this is not a unique story there are thousands out there. I feel for you and don' t mean to come across in a harsh way, but affairs and deceit have become so common.

Reply to anon
Posted by: Lady | 2010/01/19

Angel - what are you doing with this man??He has no respect for you whatsoever, nevermind the sex he cheated on you!! Dont settle for that - you deserve better.

Reply to Lady
Posted by: Jay | 2010/01/19

Give ur hudy the idea that u geting it somewhere else, im mean buy urself new sexy underwear make sure he see' s them, dress up nice n sex evry time u go out. then see wat hed goner!!!

Reply to Jay

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