Posted by: barbara | 2012-11-16

sex in older couples

lost interest in sex with my hubby of 8 years, he dont let me feel sexy anymore,

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Our expert says:
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It is quite common that in the beginning of relationship women may have a greater interest in sex and possibly be less inhibited in sex than you would normally be. This is due to chemicals in the brain which are released in the beginning of a relationship - amongst other things they result in slightly higher testosterone levels in women which may account for higher sex drive. Unfortunately due to a cruel trick of nature these changes are temporary and after a while (between 6months - 4 years) your sex drive returns to a more 'normal level'. This is quite commonly described in couples so what you are describing in your relationship may be quite normal. What is important to know then is sexual desire in men and women is often different. Women may find pleasure/satisfaction in being intimate a loving without necesssarily feeling like penetrative intercourse at every encouter. This can be likened to an appetite for food. Just because your partner feel like a three course meal does not mean that you do. It is important is to focus enough time on pleasuring or foreplay before penetrative intercourse is attempted. Women take longer to respond and to become aroused than men do. Perhaps you need to look at your relationship generally. Are you spending enough time together and doing the things that you enjoy together as you used to? It would a good idea to discuss these issues in a non confrontational way with you husband. You need to be able to explain what feels good for you and how perhaps you both can work on your relationship. It may be necessary to seek the help of a health professional in your area. For further information please consult SASHA’s website at For referral to a professional in your vicinity, please send an email to

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Marge | 2012-11-26

This piece was cgoent, well-written, and pithy.

Reply to Marge
Posted by: Brian | 2012-11-25

So what''s your question - or are you just making a statement?

Reply to Brian
Posted by: botshelo | 2012-11-19

he does not make you feel sexy,are you sexy,what exactly must he do to make you feel sexy,do you wear some sexy undies for him,do you do stuff that sexy people do?

Reply to botshelo
Posted by: man | 2012-11-17

Barbara are you over weight? Do you think you look sexy? If you don''t think you are how can your hubby think so?

Reply to man
Posted by: XXX | 2012-11-16

I don''t believe 8 years of marriage should cause this,unless you are maybe over 60 or something.
Couples are having sex at all ages these days,so there might be a health issue with him.Is he overweight,a smoker,drinks a lot of alcohol,a drug user etc.All of these can impact his libido.
The other one is that he might not be attracted to you any longer.

Reply to XXX
Posted by: Chris758 | 2012-11-16

And how old are you? 8 years of marraige is not that long!! Why doesn''t he let you feel sexy? Do you feel sexy and do you do sexy things so that you feel you want to have sex with your husband? Does he ignore your efforts?

Reply to Chris758

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