Posted by: Anon | 2010-02-19

Sex an Issue

I just wanna know....
Why when your patner is not interested in sex they always seem to turn the tables and make it seem that the other is at fault?
I mean they pick on petty crap and make as if they right and you wrong just to avoid sleeping with you.

Is this common out there?
Someone with teh same problem?

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Our expert says:
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very common - welcome to the world of relationships

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Our users say:
Posted by: len | 2010-02-22

I am with chris as well.
But how right is it and are there not other solutions ??

Reply to len
Posted by: Another Chris | 2010-02-19

Im with you Chris on this one, my attitude is exactly the same.

Reply to Another Chris
Posted by: Chris | 2010-02-19

And then the partner asks: HOW COULD YOU BE UNFAITHFULL? If you do not get it at home go look for it else where....that is my attitude now!!

Reply to Chris
Posted by: Short Rations | 2010-02-19

Oooooo yes ! Sex used as tool either to reward or to punish. Here is my take on a few issues for what it is worth. A sudden change in sex activities, like suddenly finding it " dirty"  or " old hat"  or being " tired"  when the partner is away from home on business or comes home late from " work"  is an almost 100% certainty that they are getting it elsewhere. Sorry to say this but its true in my experience. You hear about someone complaining about lack of sex under these circumstances and some time thereafter...Wham !! They are either discovered in adultry OR they come up with the old divorce story.

Where it is used as a tool to punish or reward is a sad state of affairs as it cheapens ones relationship.

Spontaneous actions, like XXXX describes, " let me catch you naked"  etc is wonderful as it keeps the relationship on a healthy footing. Sitting opposite your partner without panties and giving him a discreet peep is also a great one. Promises to some exciting sexual activities later in the day is another good approach. Bottom line, be honest, be loving and be ever considerate of your partner

Reply to Short Rations
Posted by: Whena | 2010-02-19

Puck you guys can describe my household.

I then also know that she has a fling going or is seeing one of her lovers when this happens

Reply to Whena
Posted by: Anon | 2010-02-19

My wife picks on petty things, get angry, creates bad feelings and go''s to bed..
I have noticed this... when ever she see''s i''m in the mood or want sex she makes some excuse..

Reply to Anon
Posted by: Casper | 2010-02-19

Same problem here, issue is my wife has some kind of mental issue, due to the manner her stepdad used to treat her, no sexual abuse, just verbal abuse and he used to trat her bad.
She will never admit if she is at fault, so we dont have sex often, and she always complains she doesn''t get much,

Reply to Casper
Posted by: Anon | 2010-02-19

Hey there XXXX..
Its so clear that they make an excuse not to sleep with us....
Not sure about you but get accused alot of having an affair yet i''m not..
Too me its a way of starting an argument and of cos that leads to NO SEX.

Well its sad that we go through this...

Reply to Anon
Posted by: XXXX | 2010-02-19

I seem to agree with you, my sisuation is my hubby doesn''t want me to say for an example "  will say after my shower I must find you naked as I want to do something to you"  his response will be you are mad, we did it yesteray , and my response will be why are you selfish whenever he wants I give it to him and whenever I want sometimes he comes up with excuses and its annoys me a lot at one point in time we agreed that I don''t need to say something before If i want it I must just start he won''t hv a problem.''

Bt yesterday I did it , his response was very negative and it was clear that he didn''t want to have. I went to bed there he start trying to touch me, the I said " Then what"  he withdrew after that never said any word until this morning he didn''t even say bye bye when he left , I just kept quiet.....

Reply to XXXX

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