Our expert says:
I agree with your sensible attitude towards his interest in porn ; and that once he is mailing girls met on the web and talking about sex, even suggesting a meeting, its gone too far. It may be a persistent fantasy of his, and maybe indeed he doesn't intend to act on it, but its still inconsiderate to one's partner. He could of course work with you to act out a fantasy of meeting a stranger ( you ) for a romantic evening, but some men are very literal, and not so good at role play. Couples counselling would indeed be a good idea, and if he's reluctant, maybe because he sees it as a place where he will be scolded, work on persuading him to give it a try. Tell him you really do love him, as you've told us, but that you need to work together on enhacing mutual understanding ; and if he wants you to tolerate this aspect of him, he ought to tolerate your desire for mutual counselling
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