Our expert says:
This may seem confusing and the honest answer is that there are many possibilities here. I don't know whether her sexual abuse affects her sexual response; it can for some, but others manage to enjoy their sexuality despite childhood abuse.
If she is suffering as a result of her abuse, it may be that she is able to focus on the pornography (rather than herself) and is able to respond with arousal almost 'indirectly'. It may have nothing to do with the abuse and may be that she needs more time to become aroused. There are many options here and a more full assessment is required to respond accurately.
If you haven't already asked her why she thinks it is, then do so. If she has an understanding of it, then maybe she can shed some light on this for you. Ultimately, it looks like you are both still able to enjoy intimacy, which is good. One suggestion though - try a different lube as KY tends to get sticky...lubes like 'Sylk', 'Play' or 'Astroglide' are all good options....there are many more better than KY for sex.
Claire - SASHA
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