Our expert says:
There are a few issues that need to be addressed here. Firstly, everyone’s interest in sex is different, so don’t think you are ‘not sexual’ or compare with other people. Secondly, it is quite common that in the beginning of relationship women may have a greater interest in sex and possibly be less inhibited in sex than her 'default' position would be. This is due to chemicals in the brain which are released in the beginning of a relationship - amongst other things they result in slightly higher testosterone levels in women which may account for higher sex drive. Unfortunately due to a cruel trick of nature these changes are temporary and after a while (between 6months - 4 years) she returns to a more 'normal level'. Thirdly, it takes time and effort to work on a sexual relationship and you are relatively young, so it is still a sensitive subject; awkward and self-conscious. Naturally you don’t want to hurt or make the guy feel ‘inadequate’, but he will feel more adequate with some clear guidance. Tell him how secure you feel in your relationship then get in touch with what sensations are pleasurable and learn to communicate clearly. Sex is a bit like food, sometimes it is really great and other times not so great but the closeness is good. Do fun things together and just enjoy one another’s company. Expert opinions are provided by the SA Sexual Health Association: www.sexualhealth.co.za
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