Our expert says:
Sounds pretty normal - claiming not to love you is one of the few weapons of self-defence open to a child. And your husband should not be hitting him - that's abusive, and a lousy way to develop discipline. And presumably, being a sensible kid, he expects you to protect him from being hit by his father.
Focus on the central issue, one of a lack of a proper and effective system of discipline not involving physical violence - a counsellor or child shrink could help you work out a proper plan to develop this, with you and your husband working together to encourage good behaviour and discourage bad behaviour, without violence being involved at all.
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