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Question
Posted by: Sammy | 2010/07/02

Self-esteem

Hi, is there something wrong with me. I am very lucky to still have a job. I am working as a receptionist/secretary. Everytime a new client or possible client shows up I get anxious and are always observing or thinking what that person is thinking of me. I have very low self-esteem and do not think I am pretty. In school I always wanted a boyfriend but did not know how to speak to them. Now I am at work and do not know how to communicate and it is making me depressed. I do want friends but I do not know how to start a conversation or think that they will think I am boring. I am 26 and am afraid of everything, it feels as if everyone is watching me when I am shopping. It puts a great amount of stress on me.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

It does sound as though you have low self-esteem, quite possibly a degree of social anxiety disorder and counselling could help you to improve that, and it responds reall well to treatment. Realize that clients and visitors have not come to evaluate the receptionist, and are wrapped up in their own thoughts, plans and worries, and maybe also their own self-consciousness and worry about the interview or meeting ahead of them. Its really rare for them to manage to notice or remember the receptionist. UInless perhaps you insist on dressing entirely in red and turn cartwheels across the floor. In which case they may just notice, before returning to their own worries.
Don't wory so much about HOW to communicate and just do it in simple and less complex ways.
Say something about the weather, say something nice about what someone is wearing, whatever. And if they don't seem interested to may conversation stop assuming this means there's something awful wrong with you - it probably just means they're pre-occupied with their own concerns, and can't be bothered to think about someone else - you or whoever else might be sitting at the reception desk

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Sammy | 2010/07/06

Hi Sweetness

I will like to chat. Why don''t you give your e-mail and I will e-mail you.

Reply to Sammy
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/07/03

It does sound as though you have low self-esteem, quite possibly a degree of social anxiety disorder and counselling could help you to improve that, and it responds reall well to treatment. Realize that clients and visitors have not come to evaluate the receptionist, and are wrapped up in their own thoughts, plans and worries, and maybe also their own self-consciousness and worry about the interview or meeting ahead of them. Its really rare for them to manage to notice or remember the receptionist. UInless perhaps you insist on dressing entirely in red and turn cartwheels across the floor. In which case they may just notice, before returning to their own worries.
Don't wory so much about HOW to communicate and just do it in simple and less complex ways.
Say something about the weather, say something nice about what someone is wearing, whatever. And if they don't seem interested to may conversation stop assuming this means there's something awful wrong with you - it probably just means they're pre-occupied with their own concerns, and can't be bothered to think about someone else - you or whoever else might be sitting at the reception desk

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Tinky | 2010/07/02

Something I''ve learned in life, people are too pre-occupied with themselves to think about another person. Not intentionally - its just the way things are sometimes.

Good Luck

Reply to Tinky
Posted by: Sweetness | 2010/07/02

Hi Sammy,

We kinda of work in the same kind of work I''m an office Administrator and if you wanna chat/be friends send me our email address.

Reply to Sweetness

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