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Question
Posted by: ME | 2009-07-17

SCHOOL PROBLEMS

I have the right to give my daughter the best education I can afford. Yes, I knew my husband had a son when I married him. No I do not see why I have to feel guilty in not wanting to contribute to send him to a private school as well. As it is my husband does not really contribute towards my daughter cost of living. I buy her clothes, her toys etc. I buy for my stepson. I' m drawing the line at spending thousands on private school and he is not even interested in his schoolwork. He cares more about playing games and going to friends. His father threatens him with staying inside the house through the holidays if he doesn' t get good marks but that doesn' t even have an effect on him.All of you who feel that you have the right to comment on this issue, keep them to yourself unless you really know where I' m coming from.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Exactly. I agree with you totally. His father may need some expert advice on how to motivate the kid to do at least adequate school work, and that would be a better investment than sending him to a very expensive school where he would be unhappy and out of his depth. Funny how generous some people are, when it come to spending someone else's money

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Our users say:
Posted by: Karla | 2009-07-17

Maybe he has learning disabilities or concentration problem. I agree with all parties and although you have told him to get his act together, maybe as the doc says you should try other methods. Do you help them with their homework? Lock up the playstation, etc and tell him if he studies for every 30 minutes he can play for 10 minutes? When we were kids we weren' t allowed to watch tv/ play pc as we pleased. Maybe try pry him away from the playstation slowly but surely. Reward him for good marks- if your stepson generally gets D' s or in the 40% or whatever system they use these days, make it so if he gets a C or 50% for a subject reward him with extra playstation time or something. The bigger the reward the bigger the improvement.

Reply to Karla
Posted by: Me | 2009-07-17

Thanks Liza. I accept your apology. I get what you are saying. And what is so funny is that we have told him that if he really wants to go to this private school he will have to improve on his grades. Of course he promised that he will but his last report showed otherwise. He was just on his playstation and playing outside after promising that he studied and he knows his work. I didn' t say anything except Ok lets just hope your results reflect that.

Reply to Me
Posted by: Liza | 2009-07-17

I apologise if you found my previous reply to your post offensive. It wasn' t meant to be judgemental, insulting or negative in any other way. I was merely raising my opinion on how I would like MY sons'  stepmother to act. I also wasn' t trying to say that you don' t care for your stepson although my words could be misread in this manner.

The information contained in the questions and replies are usually very subjective. Tainted by everyones'  different life experiences. Sometimes not containing enough info. Sometimes things are taken out of context. Try not to let the subjective opinions of others get to you. Only you know the exact situation and context.

Have a great day!
Liza

Reply to Liza
Posted by: me | 2009-07-17

Thank you Cybershrink. I mean you are the expert here, yours is the only advice I wanted.

Reply to me

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