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Question
Posted by: Joanne | 2010-09-29

Roller coaster

Hi i have been married for almost a year &  from start things were not good. My husband is a police and i am a admin clerk i make it my duty to save money every month in order for us to have a house of our own were as my husband spends every cent he as. Is that fair? i help him with the accounts &  bill infact i do more than he does. we living with is parents at the moment and everytime we argue he tells me to pack and go to my mums place, things got so bad this time that i packed up and moved in with my mum. my husband is a ungratefull man and dont appreciate anything i do for him. this time i dont want to go back to him or to his house. Help what should i do? Is our marriage worth fixing?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

No it isn;'t fair, and no wise man ever spends all of his earnings. What does he spend it all on ? He sounds too immature to be an effective husband, and I can understand why you may not want to go back with him, to his mom's house. It dosn't sound clear that this marriage is fixable, let alone worth fixing. Would he consider seeing a marriage counsellor with you ? Or does he see nothing needing to be fixed other than you ?
Maybe rather consult a lawyer to protect your rights and your earnings.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Mel | 2010-09-29

No.........Sorry it''s not worth fixing. Leave him. He puts you out of his mother''s house........Hell no!! He thinks you are so desperate for him and his mother''s house. He doesn''t even have a house of his own. It sounds like you are trying to make provision for the future, while MR Officer of the law are just making and breaking the way he wants to..........I mean 1 year and he is behaving like this. Stay at your mom''s for a while, save as much as you can, coz there''s no place like mommy''s....and try and buy a house of your own. It would appear you are still young.........Try and get yourself sorted out, house, car, etc......And do it now, while you still staying with mom, don''t let a mommy''s baby (your husband) treat you like you have nothing and like you are nothing...Leave him with mommy dearest and you work on your success ALONE!!!!!!

Reply to Mel
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-09-29

No it isn;'t fair, and no wise man ever spends all of his earnings. What does he spend it all on ? He sounds too immature to be an effective husband, and I can understand why you may not want to go back with him, to his mom's house. It dosn't sound clear that this marriage is fixable, let alone worth fixing. Would he consider seeing a marriage counsellor with you ? Or does he see nothing needing to be fixed other than you ?
Maybe rather consult a lawyer to protect your rights and your earnings.

Reply to cybershrink

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