advertisement
Question
Posted by: Garfield | 2009/10/29

Robin Norwood

Hi CS

Hope you are doing well on this nearly-Friday :-)

Have you read the book by Robin Norwood called ' Women who love too much" ? (I think that although the title refers to women, I really do think it could be generalised to both men &  women).

If you have, I would be interested to hear your thoughts on it.

My Psychologist suggested to me that I should read it. I am findng it good - I can see my self in some of it, but can also see that some of it is not relevant to me or my situation.

The scary bit for me (and also the part that is oseems to be offering me some relief, in that I dont feel crazy!) is the references to dysfunctional families/dysfunctional patterns within families.

I know that my parents love me and that they have tried their level best with all of us  and that they want us to be happy. But, I have always felt confused by my ' role'  in the family &  that very often it is truly unfair. (I wont go into the details as will do this with my Psych next week).

It' s not a case of me wantng to blame someone else for my problems, but more, a sense of wanting to understand, and finding a HUGE sense of relief, that I am not nuts, and my perception is not as skewed as my parents continually tell me that it is.

I am not angry or blaming my parents, but it is just so HUGE to be able to understand some of it, and recognise the patterns and then hopefully be able to recognise it in other people I will meet in my life, and not continue the hge cycle of self doubt htat has spiralled so out of control and which I continue to repeat in my relationships.

(Sorry I may be waffling a little), but it just feels so good to be able to talk to my Psych in a safe place and not be told that I am crazy/imagining it/in my head. And to find a whole book on it that further adds some depth to the feelings I have had for such a long time!

Thanks for listening CS, and I would really like your thoughts on this?

Have a GOOD day
Garfield

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I haven't, as I can't afford to buy and read pop psych books with all the other reading I need to do. I agree that the book surely should refer to PEOPLE who love too much, but presumably the publishers thought women would be the main market ?
Its a wise reader who both recognizes which parts o a book have useful reference to themselves, and whioch parts dont, rather than feeling obliged to identify with it all.
Even if it does no more than help to convince you that you're no nuts, its a valuiable book. And of course, if one looks at the games even loving families play, one of the rules is that we must all insist that we are actually playing no games at all.
I'm always a bit puzled by the folks who try to dismiss someone's troubles or suffering as "all in the head" - where else should it be ? The head is what we think and feel with - the problems would hardly be all in your knee. So what they're doing is the equivalent of complaining that your appendicitis is "all in the appendix".

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

1
Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2009/10/29

I haven't, as I can't afford to buy and read pop psych books with all the other reading I need to do. I agree that the book surely should refer to PEOPLE who love too much, but presumably the publishers thought women would be the main market ?
Its a wise reader who both recognizes which parts o a book have useful reference to themselves, and whioch parts dont, rather than feeling obliged to identify with it all.
Even if it does no more than help to convince you that you're no nuts, its a valuiable book. And of course, if one looks at the games even loving families play, one of the rules is that we must all insist that we are actually playing no games at all.
I'm always a bit puzled by the folks who try to dismiss someone's troubles or suffering as "all in the head" - where else should it be ? The head is what we think and feel with - the problems would hardly be all in your knee. So what they're doing is the equivalent of complaining that your appendicitis is "all in the appendix".

Reply to cybershrink

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement