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Question
Posted by: Concerned Friend | 2010/09/16

Relationship working second time round

Just curious to know what the chances are of a relationship working a second time round when it failed on the first attempt. The reason for the relationship/marriage not working the first time was because the children from the wife''s previous marriage were young school going children. A divorce transpired and they moved with their mom to another town where they have subsequently completed their schooling. Since the children have now finished with school, it seems the woman would like to rekindle the relationship, after a break of approximately 4 years but is still staying where she moved to and the other party is where he stayed after the breakup. Unfortunately, the relationship with the child from his first marriage was not a happy one either. As a concerned friend what is the chances of this relationship working again?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Generally, the chances are no great - if there were genuine reasons for the relationship failing the first time round, then unless there has been serious work with expert help to change the problems, such as couples counselling, the same reasons for breaking up are very likely to still be there.
If the couple have been separated, apparently both geographically and psychologically, they have had no chance to fix or solve anything, and the chances of succeeding without proper help, are surely not good

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: XXX | 2010/09/16

I suppose the success rate is poor,however,my wife and I got divorced and after 2 months got together and whilst we still have minor obstacles,are very happy together now.
I also have a friend that has got together with her ex-husband and they appear to be getting better each day.

Reply to XXX
Posted by: Gap | 2010/09/16

Been there, done that and it did not work for us. Ex hubby and me that is. We tried to get back together twice after the divorce and although circumstances are not the same as above - it just did not work out. I therefore think that people do not change and it will not work out.

Reply to Gap
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/09/16

Generally, the chances are no great - if there were genuine reasons for the relationship failing the first time round, then unless there has been serious work with expert help to change the problems, such as couples counselling, the same reasons for breaking up are very likely to still be there.
If the couple have been separated, apparently both geographically and psychologically, they have had no chance to fix or solve anything, and the chances of succeeding without proper help, are surely not good

Reply to cybershrink

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