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Question
Posted by: DS | 2010-02-24

Rehab

Hi doc

My fiance is off to rehab tomorrow, finally. Im relieved and hopeful that this will help sort him out. I owe it to our relationship to stick by him thru this, and to our daughter. I am going to start seeing my therapist again, to try work on myself. need to learn to forgive him for hurting me and start letting go of my issues.

I am reluctant to tell anyone where he is going for fear of judgement, its his cross to bare and he should tell people. Am i a bad person for not feeling like being judged. I also feel like he might feel like its not my place to tell people. Altho, as the other partner in our relationship and as a person directly affected by this, i dont know why I should feel bad about disclosing where he is... I do. What a messed up situation.

I feel like sending all his so called friends who I hae begged time and time again to leave us in peace, altho i know he has a choice, a snotty sms. I probably shouldnt, but i almost feel an I told you so coming on. Maybe they will leave him alone now, but again that should be something he does for himself.

I dont know how I feel about this whole thing, i know that I love him and I want him to get better and if its going to take rehab so be it. But i feel too ashamed to speak to anyone about.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sounds like some realistic and sensible plans all round. I hear nothing like a Bad Person - should you relish being judged by the ignorance of others ? The most effective "I told You SO" is the one you never need to say, letting them realize it for themselves. I understand your concern about how others might react, buty I hear nothing for you to feel ashamed of

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-02-24

Sounds like some realistic and sensible plans all round. I hear nothing like a Bad Person - should you relish being judged by the ignorance of others ? The most effective "I told You SO" is the one you never need to say, letting them realize it for themselves. I understand your concern about how others might react, buty I hear nothing for you to feel ashamed of

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