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Question
Posted by: Lisa | 2008/09/07

Re: Death of cat

Hi doc

Thanks for your reply.

So I have thought about getting another cat, but I want it to be a kitten cos my baby was only 11months old when I put him down yesterday. I still hurt alot because I wonder if I made the right choice or if I should have said ok to steroids to keep him living until we found out the cause (even if it could not be cured). Im sure the steroids would have helped him, but he couldnt walk and he seemed very depressed and just lay in the same spot until you moved him. And trying to force feed him was heartbreaking because he didnt want it but I had to try.
I know there are alot of big cats needing loving homes. I have another cat (1.5yrs old) and my boyfriends sisters 3 cats (a mother 5yrs and her offspring 4yrs old) joined us last wednesday because they left on an extended holiday, but the cats will likely be living with us even after they get back. The house still feels so empty without my baby boy. I also have a puppy who is now 8weeks old, but I just cant seem to give her the love she needs now that he is gone, and so I feel like I need a little kitten to help me return to normal. I dont know how well a kitten will fit in here now that there are the 3 other cats (the puppy is going to go to my boyfriends sister when she gets back because they live on a farm with other dogs so atleast the dog will have company and not be in an empty house during the day with cats). I also dont want to feel like Im trying to replace my kitty with another one, even though I know nothing will replace him. He was an indoor cat, and my other one is an outdoor cat, so I always saw him and now he is suddenly gone Im so sad. So confused now as what to do and if I should have done more for him :( I wasnt with him during the euthanasia because I was crying so much and the doctor didnt ask me if I wanted to be with him, but I did sit with him for 5 mins after kissing and stroking him just to say my last goodbye.

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Our expert says:
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One always has doubts, and worries that you could have done more ( and of course, whatever we didn't do feels as though it might have helped, even though it might not have done so at all, and might merely have prolonged the suffering.)
Kittens seem almost infinitely adjustable to circumstances, so if the other creatures accept it, it'll be fine. Nothing can replace the person or pet one has lost, but a new cat can give you a useful new focus. Try Animal Welfare or CLAW, they have some lovely kittens.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: jcat | 2008/09/08

Hi Lisa,

My sympathies on your loss, and I know how hard it can be to lose a loved animal. Part of it is how suddenly it happened, too - your healthy baby was an invalid and then dead within days.
You have to trust your vet on one thing - that he would not have recommended euthanasia lightly for a young cat. Whatever was wrong, at his age steroids and force-feeding etc are pretty indicative of a major problem. And for a young cat, you also have to think of his needs for an active and dignified life. It' s hard, but sometimes what we owe our friends is not trying everything, but accepting that a painless death is the best way to honour them.
I work with CLAW, and can completely recommend getting a kitty from either them or any of the other welfare groups. A young cat, even if not a tiny kitten, will fit into a multi-cat household with very few issues.
Seriously though, as a cat-owner and lover myself, I would really recommend that you wait a few weeks before looking for a new baby. You are grieving, and you need a period to get through that, before you can welcome a new addition to the family. You will never be able to replace your kitty, but you need to heal just a bit yourself before opening your heart to a new kitten.
Best wishes,
jcat

Reply to jcat
Posted by: Kitten | 2008/09/07

I got two beautiful kittens from the Animal Welfare Society in Stellenbosch.

Try them!

Reply to Kitten

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