Our expert says:
Do not get married until these issues have been sorted out by you with the help of a proper psychologist in therapy. It is highly unfair to marry anyone when you have problems regarding sex.
Sometimes any of us might not like a particular technique or idea our partner may have, and should feel free to express that, and between you you can adapt.
But when, as you seem to be describing, you NEVER ever feel in the mood for sex, never enjoy it, and are highly reluctant to egage in it, that's not a fair burden to place on your partner. Usually we are all able to be in the mood and enjoy sex, and not to be able to do so is a problem which can respond really well to therapy, which can free you to enjoy this aspect of life.
Otherwise, its like someone who says they only reluctantly eat, but have never ever enjoyed the flavour of food. They're missing something, and unnecessarily limiting their enjoyable experience of life.
If this poor man has to "fight" for sex, Please don't marry him until you have sorted this out. to efefctively lie to him by occasionally pretending to enjoy it, is no basis for an honest and happy or lasting marriage.
As you admit late in your message, you would "seriously love to learn how I can make myself enjoy sex" - you can, you should, and you deserve the best psych help available. Do please, for the sake of both of you, arrange to see a good experienced shrink for an assessment of the problem, and a discussion of treatment options, which will have to include proper expert counselling.
When this has been sorted out, you can proceed to get maried and you will then both be much happer and more likely to have a long and happy marriage.
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