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Question
Posted by: Lebzaa | 2012/04/10

Quick One

Good Day Doc

Hope you good. I have this tinsy problem. I have dated this boy very brief in 2011. Apparantley he saw me somewhere and he was too scared to approach me until we bumped into each other and well I was flattered. We dated for like two months and we just stopped contacting each other. I assumed we over. he resurfaced towards end of last year. This time around we broke up and told each other where to get off( you know breakups mos).
Just yeaterday he resurfaced again. Telling me how he deleted my number from his system and thought we were done, only to find he was not. So he tells me he''s incomplete without me. Even if we can just be friends so long am in his life. He claims that he had to go to my gym club just to get hold of my digits.

Doc my problem with the brother is that I dont feel him. I just dont feel ok to be with him. I tried to feel something for him and it did not work. Is it really possible for one person to fall in love all by themselves. I mean the brother breaks my heart but I feel nothing. I agreed to see him just to see what will happen. Am still not sure. How can I just return the brother''s love??????

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

He sounds rather confused as to what and who he wants, and a relationship that blows hot and cold so often is unlikely to be happy or long-lasting. If you need to TRY to feel anything for him, then there is no basis for a good relationship, and his apparent fondness for you hardly has any sensible basis, does it ? Its not clear whether you're helping him by responding and meeting with him every time he changes his mid again and thinks he likes you again. There's an element of stalking, of irrational behaviour, on his side, which would make me uneasy and reluctant to meet with him, rather than just calmly and pelasantly saying that you wish him well, you're sure he'll be really happy, eventually, with someone else, but from your side it just won't work out, and you're not going to see him again.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Lebza | 2012/04/11

Thanks Doc.

Reply to Lebza
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/04/10

He sounds rather confused as to what and who he wants, and a relationship that blows hot and cold so often is unlikely to be happy or long-lasting. If you need to TRY to feel anything for him, then there is no basis for a good relationship, and his apparent fondness for you hardly has any sensible basis, does it ? Its not clear whether you're helping him by responding and meeting with him every time he changes his mid again and thinks he likes you again. There's an element of stalking, of irrational behaviour, on his side, which would make me uneasy and reluctant to meet with him, rather than just calmly and pelasantly saying that you wish him well, you're sure he'll be really happy, eventually, with someone else, but from your side it just won't work out, and you're not going to see him again.

Reply to cybershrink

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