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Question
Posted by: Mommy | 2009-02-19

pushing and shoving at creche advice

My 22 month old and I chatted as we usually do when I pick him up from creche and he happened to tell me that his little friend at creche pulled him around, and from the way he demonstrated it was really hard. So because he cant speak full sentences yet, I wanted to be sure of what really happened and asked him a few questions, like did it hurt when his friend pulled him, he said yes, I asked if he cried, he said yes, then I asked him what he did when his friend pulled him, he said he pushed him. And i was kind of thrown off and didnt know how to respond, I ended up saying that he shouldnt push back, that he should tell the teacher if it happens again. I said that because I didnt want to encourage him fighting and hitting back.
Was it wrong of me to respond like tht? I dont want him to end up allowing his friends to bully him about and he runs to teacher or doesnt stand up for himself, because of what I tell him. But I also dont wanna encourage him to push and fight. Am I making too much of this? And how do I handle a similiar incident in future

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Its entirely reasonable that he pushed back when being painfully pulled by another kid. This sounds like self-defence rather than anything objecionable --- maybe you're worrying a bit too much. Discuss this with his tacher, who will have loads of experience of such things, and she what she advises/

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