Our expert says:
Well, if it happens in his sleep, he wouldn't be able to explain it to you. And an explanation from him isn't really what you need --- he's not doing it deliberately ( if he were, he'd choose a time more convenient to him! ) Purple sums up the position rather well. And its a good point that acidents happen, but the more upset he got or was made to feel aboput the acident ( not necessarily you blaming him directly, but him seeing you being upset and bothered ) this might increase the likelihood of further such events. Sometimes one does see such a slightly older child, even if seemingly happy with a new sib, notice how much extra attention the baby receives for nappy changes, and may without thinking of it as a strategy, regress to be les mature in this respect, expecting more attention, too.
Give him a bit more attention with praise when he does NOT have an accident, and deal with the accidents more mater-of-factly and with minimal interaction.
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