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Question
Posted by: Help | 2009/12/23

Problem?

I am a married man with 2 lovely kids. My wife &  I have been married for 10 years now and have a fairly excellent relationship. I have lost my sexually drive to have sex with my wife and not too sure what to do. I have to force an erection at night just to have sex with her. BUT, when I see other sexy women I get instanstly aroused. I haven' t told my wife about her not turning me on, because I don' t want to upset her or hurt her feelings. I am even thinking about get some sexual enhancers to help with my arousal as I do not want my wife to think that I am having an affair (Which I am Not)

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Sexual enhancers might be of some help, although it seems that it is not so much a physical dilemma as what it is a mental/psychological/too comfortable and used to one another dilemma. I would suggest that you seek the professional assistance of a psychologist/marriage counselor that could guide you. Furthermore you could focus on exploring your wife’s sexy-ness and reconnect what you two have. Assignments that are described on our website could be useful -www.sexualhealth.co.za. Long term relationships can lose their spark over time and we need to keep paying attention to the oil in the love lamp.

You are also welcome to contact our helpline – 0860100262 where you could be assisted to get in touch with a therapist as close a possible to you.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: XXX | 2009/12/23

If you are not under stress or on certain anti depressant meds it could simply be that you need to give your sex life a bit of a boost with your wife ie you might be a bit stale.Do something different,get her to dress sexy,send her sexy emails/texts,have a bubble bath with candles etc etc
Good luck,don' t have an affair

Reply to XXX
Posted by: sexologist | 2009/12/23

Sexual enhancers might be of some help, although it seems that it is not so much a physical dilemma as what it is a mental/psychological/too comfortable and used to one another dilemma. I would suggest that you seek the professional assistance of a psychologist/marriage counselor that could guide you. Furthermore you could focus on exploring your wife’s sexy-ness and reconnect what you two have. Assignments that are described on our website could be useful -www.sexualhealth.co.za. Long term relationships can lose their spark over time and we need to keep paying attention to the oil in the love lamp.

You are also welcome to contact our helpline – 0860100262 where you could be assisted to get in touch with a therapist as close a possible to you.

Reply to sexologist

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