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Question
Posted by: boo | 2009/02/02

Problem

Thanks for your response. I did not mention that he is moving out today - started packing on Thursday already. We had a wonderful day yesterday - very relaxed spoke about everyhting but our relationship do I ask him what happens now....how much time does one give a person, how do i know that it'  s not lost forever, how do i know that he will take me back. 10 years is a lifetime and we were going to get married, I love him very much and don' t know what to do?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

These are all excellent questions --- TO ASK HIM. NObody else aliveknows the answers to them. It is unfair for anyone, especially after a long relationship, to get engaged then wander off soon afterwards. HE owes you an explanation

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Our users say:
Posted by: Shaz | 2009/02/02

In your first post you said fiance of 10yrs so I assumed u guys were engaged for 10 yrs, but still 10 yrs is a long time without any real committment and now that Oct is approaching it is rather convenient that he is packing up and leaving. I could be wrong but it looks like he' s been looking for an excuse to bail on you, I could be wrong and I hope I am for your sake, but like CS said, only he can give you all the answers and by the look of things he owes you some. If you have been together for so long and went as far as making plans to get married, it is rather strange that he is giving up so easy. You may not want to give up but it is in your best interest to find out why HE is willing to.

Good Luck to you!

Reply to Shaz
Posted by: boo | 2009/02/02

Dear Shaz,

Thanks for your advice, but confused as he &  I made a comittment to get married in Oct - been dating for 10 years engaged for 8mths. What should I do? I do want to make this work one can t just give up can you

Reply to boo
Posted by: Shaz | 2009/02/02

Hi boo,

I think you should cut your loses and move on, I mean 10 years is a long time to be someones fiance, maybe you should think about why that marriage never took place. i think he too is fed up of the whole thing and just wants to start afresh, it mght do you both some good actually. YOu can try and " win"  him over but seriously, 10 years is a long time without any REAL committment from the oppisite sex. Think about it!

Good Luck to you!

Reply to Shaz

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