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Question
Posted by: Noob | 2010/11/11

Prepping for my first time, need advise!

Hi,

I am getting married soon, and I am still a virgin, she is not. I need to know/get advise on the first time. What do I need to know, d, avoid... etc. :)

pretty excited! finally!!!!!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

There is a lot that can be said here so I will try to be brief. If you have never been sexual with a woman, you will need to know a couple of things to begin with. (1) Don't expect yourself to know what to do to please her - women's bodies vary tremendously - ever changing in sensitivity so ask your wife for feedback about what she likes when you are touching/stimulating her. Listen to the feedback - if you don't know what she means, get her to show you with your hand on top of hers. Enjoy the foreplay and precoital stimulation before penetration - enjoy her whole body, don't just go for the genitals/breasts at the outset. It might take some pressure off you to stimulate her to orgasm (orally/manually) before penetration takes place...
(2) Women take a lot longer than men to become aroused and to reach orgasm (if indeed they do this), so expect that you might need to learn to delay ejaculation to prolong the experience. This means slowing the stimulation and being aware of your excitement levels so that you know when to 'cool off'. If you struggle with this, don't be afraid to take some advice (repost here again or read up elsewhere - there is plenty of info available).
On a more general note: don't put pressure on yourself to get it right - she knows you are learning, so enjoy the learning process together. Don't treat her as an expert other than an expert on herself (but even then, many women who have been sexual before have still never really learned about their sexual response/pleasure). Feel free to give her some guidance on your pleasure too, but make sure that you are taking turns on focusing on the other - it's give and take. Have fun and don't expect too much - rather let it be a pleasant surprise than a let down.

Warm wishes and congratulations on the marriage.
Claire - SASHA

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

6
Our users say:
Posted by: deearc | 2010/11/12

you really are an idiot,how can u marry someone who hs been around for a while,she knows a lot abt dicks,talk abt saving the best for the worst.Its gonna be very loose down there and ur tiny d**k is gonna be swimming in THE OCEAN.If i were u i wud stop everything ask for my lobola back.

Reply to deearc
Posted by: Dee | 2010/11/12

Congradulations!

May I ask why you decided to save yourself for marraige?

Reply to Dee
Posted by: JJJ | 2010/11/11

You need to get exercises chief - you will definately cum in three sec- those embarassim moments are set to haunt you for the rest of your entire exisistence and will be refered to during intense arguments. So - you hire yourself a woman, practice until you get it right chief. It is not as easy as it seems on TV, you need to sharpen your technique.


gud advise - take or leave it. your marriage depends on it. Okay now i know there will be a few people who may not agree with me on this and will start texting soon, however remember they are not virgins.....take not advise from a woman about this sort of thing...ask me i know.

Reply to JJJ
Posted by: gooob | 2010/11/11

well done, you made it...you remained a virgin until marriage.

Reply to gooob
Posted by: Anon | 2010/11/11

Enjoy the ride!!! :-)

Reply to Anon
Posted by: Sexologist | 2010/11/11

There is a lot that can be said here so I will try to be brief. If you have never been sexual with a woman, you will need to know a couple of things to begin with. (1) Don't expect yourself to know what to do to please her - women's bodies vary tremendously - ever changing in sensitivity so ask your wife for feedback about what she likes when you are touching/stimulating her. Listen to the feedback - if you don't know what she means, get her to show you with your hand on top of hers. Enjoy the foreplay and precoital stimulation before penetration - enjoy her whole body, don't just go for the genitals/breasts at the outset. It might take some pressure off you to stimulate her to orgasm (orally/manually) before penetration takes place...
(2) Women take a lot longer than men to become aroused and to reach orgasm (if indeed they do this), so expect that you might need to learn to delay ejaculation to prolong the experience. This means slowing the stimulation and being aware of your excitement levels so that you know when to 'cool off'. If you struggle with this, don't be afraid to take some advice (repost here again or read up elsewhere - there is plenty of info available).
On a more general note: don't put pressure on yourself to get it right - she knows you are learning, so enjoy the learning process together. Don't treat her as an expert other than an expert on herself (but even then, many women who have been sexual before have still never really learned about their sexual response/pleasure). Feel free to give her some guidance on your pleasure too, but make sure that you are taking turns on focusing on the other - it's give and take. Have fun and don't expect too much - rather let it be a pleasant surprise than a let down.

Warm wishes and congratulations on the marriage.
Claire - SASHA

Reply to Sexologist

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