Posted by: gontse | 2009-04-02


hi CS i am a married woman with one kid and pregnant with the second one,i luv my husband very deeply but he is hurting me emotionally he doesn' t sleep at home comes and goes when he pleases him i tried talking to him if it is the baby who is pushing me away.i don' t know what to do i tried talking to my sister in law about the abortion she said that is not a solution you are married to him and like it or not he will raise that child.i know she loves but what the brother is doing to me i' m very confused and i luv him very much.please help me

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sorry, folks, for the delay in responding. I've spent an anxious day in the dark, as Tshwane City Council can't keep the lights on, and this is my third power-cut this year.
Why would any husband worth the name of "man" stray and sleep away from home ? He is showing a complete lack of respect for you and the child. Aren' here older members of your and his family you could sicsuss this with, who could remind him how a real man behaves ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Liza | 2009-04-02

I agree with Lerato about staying in a loveless and abusive relationship. I don' t agree about the abortion though. I guess it comes down to what you believe in. I had an abortion for medical reasons with the prior and subsequent counselling of my shrink. Today I have a different shrink and if my homicidal mom ever meets my previous shrink in the street, there won' t be enough left to hold a funeral...

Reply to Liza
Posted by: Lerato | 2009-04-02

your life and your unborn baby' s life is at risk here! if it' s safe for you to have an abortion - do it! forget about everyone' s opinions and make a selfish decision - selfishness is a good thing sometimes. You already have a child that you have to live for and your husband is not making your life easy. Run a mile girlfriend and this is from a concerned sister.

Trust me when i say that, staying in a loveless and abusive relationship for the sake of marriage, kids, whatever - is not worth it! You deserve to be loved and respected. Good luck my dear.

Reply to Lerato
Posted by: P | 2009-04-02

Well said Liesel,and also set up a family meeting both families...

Reply to P
Posted by: liesel | 2009-04-02

He sounds very selfish and the fact that he doesnt come home at night shows lack of respect towards you and your unborn baby! its a difficult one, sounds to me as if he has a mind of his own. do you think he loves you? if you do then perhaps suggest councelling, this way you can determine what is making him act in this manner. but like i say he sounds awfully selfish. good luck

Reply to liesel

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