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Question
Posted by: Sheila | 2009/10/23

Post 3957 - Justified in being angry with my mother (2)

Dear Cybershrink

I have read entire forum on Dementia etc. 100% sure my mother does not have anything like this (fortunately) and she would probably laugh at that test (of course there is nothing in the least bit funny about it), I am just trying to demonstrate how intelligent she is. No memory loss. So, why would she disrespect my privacy and the boundaries of my life and still do things she knows I don' t like or want if she loves me, knows how much it hurts and makes me angry/resentful. Why?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Having reason now to set aside hat one possibility, you have also used the correct word - its not merely about privacy, but BOUNDARIES - having respect for the other person's privacy and their wishes. You have surely discussed this with her - what does she have to say about it ? Would she be bothered if you went through her cupboards, or took some of her shoes or clothing without asking ? You might want to gently point out that while you recognize and respect her plight that results in her needing to live with you, your kindness doesn't mean she should disregard your feelings and wishes within your own home.

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: D | 2009/10/23

Its because you angry at the fact that she is living with you, you do see it as a burden, a thorn in any plans you had for your life?

Just a thought?

Reply to D
Posted by: D | 2009/10/23

Its because you angry at the fact that she is living with you, you do see it as a burden, a thorn in any plans you had for your life?

Just a thought?

Reply to D
Posted by: cybershrink | 2009/10/23

Having reason now to set aside hat one possibility, you have also used the correct word - its not merely about privacy, but BOUNDARIES - having respect for the other person's privacy and their wishes. You have surely discussed this with her - what does she have to say about it ? Would she be bothered if you went through her cupboards, or took some of her shoes or clothing without asking ? You might want to gently point out that while you recognize and respect her plight that results in her needing to live with you, your kindness doesn't mean she should disregard your feelings and wishes within your own home.

Reply to cybershrink

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