Our expert says:
Much of the evidence suggests that one is indeed born gay --- even if this isn't obvious until some circumstances in life render it obvious to you. After psychiatriy had the wisdom to stop considering homosexuality as a disease or disorder, there were some who wanted to keep recognizing what was called "ego-dystonic homosexuality", that is, homosexuality which the individual rejected or felt highly conflicted about. I think here the mistake was to see this as something about homosexuality rather than to recognize the reality of ego-dystonic sexuality as such.
The person you are describing needs to see a good local psychologist for a full assessment. Remember that cross-dressing is quite common in heterosexual males, and isn't about homosexuality per se.
Kids tend to experiment sexually at a younger age than most adults care top recognize, and generally such encounters don't seem to shape later sexual orientation.
Anyhow, counselling could well help the person ; not to "cure" his homosexuality, but to help him enhance self-esteem and confidence, and to explore and accept himself, rather than to find labels to wear.
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