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Question
Posted by: ANON | 2010/06/30

PLS HELP

I dated a guy I was sure I was gonna marry we lived together for 8 months it didnt work out...had a terrible very traumatising break up eventualy a year later (now) I met an amazing guy that I thought I loved more than my ex, the past week my ex started emailing me again and I''m starting to feel really hurt again I miss him terribly, I know this ex of mine is nothing that I should want in my life and that this new guy is perfect in every way and loves me to death- perfect marriage material, but why do I then still after all this time have such hurt feelings over my ex, my whole world collapsed when we broke up, and I got myself back up again, but now it feels like I''m slowly slipping into that stat again, please help...

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

It sounds as though you plunge into relationships very deeply and quickly. It usually takes more time to decide whether one wants to marry someone ; and a new guy may seem attractive and pleasant, but again, it takes time to decide whether he's truly amazing and worthy nof such intense love. As for your remaining feelings for your ex ( and counselling could help you to get these back into perspective ) you are probably in love with the love you THOUGHT you had, rather than the love you actually had, and risk forgetting the presumably good reasons you had for breaking up with him. Why is he now contacting you again ?

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: JJ | 2010/07/01

He is a destroyer, close your eyes and move on. What are u going to loose if you stick with your current boyfriend . Please don''t look back.

Reply to JJ
Posted by: anon | 2010/06/30

dont know he just wants to know how I''m doing this new guy I am dating NOW Ihave actually known for quite a while... so its not plunging deep into a relationship this guy I am dating I have known for a long time

Reply to anon
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/06/30

It sounds as though you plunge into relationships very deeply and quickly. It usually takes more time to decide whether one wants to marry someone ; and a new guy may seem attractive and pleasant, but again, it takes time to decide whether he's truly amazing and worthy nof such intense love. As for your remaining feelings for your ex ( and counselling could help you to get these back into perspective ) you are probably in love with the love you THOUGHT you had, rather than the love you actually had, and risk forgetting the presumably good reasons you had for breaking up with him. Why is he now contacting you again ?

Reply to cybershrink

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