Our expert says:
Sounds like this could indeed be a depression - what would be best would be for you to see a good local psychiatrist for a proper in-person assessment, and then a discussion of treatment options, which should, if possible, include psychotherapy of the CBT form, as this can deal more specifically with the habits of negative thinking you seem to have developed.
Sounds like you also need some coaching ( which the CBT counsellor could provide ) in the skills of saying No gracefully, and not accepting the burden of other people's work.
Put aside any thoughts of dying or giving up, until you have had the proper therapy you need and deserve
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