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Question
Posted by: Miss Indecisive | 2009-06-30

Please any one give me feedback on this message

Hey, I am battling to make this decision and I probably do know just need to hear others opinions.
I can either 1. Carry on writing my exams with bulimia, try to maintain weight instead of losing as I feel extremely weak right now, so much so I can bearly walk around.My want is to push myself more and more until I have to stop.Or 2. To go to a rehab for 6 months, fall yet another year behind varsity and being independent when I feel I will never be ready to give my eating disorder up as it does make me feel I can cope in this life. What happens if I get there and after 6 months I come out, waste my parents money and still I cant pull my stupid self together.I am going to be 21 in a class of 19 year olds if I bail varsity!What do I do, im scared its going to be too late very soon.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Obvously it is essential to eat properly and maintain strength if you are to have a fair chance of success in the exams --- surely your shrink can help you to control the bulimia ( raher than letting it control you ) until the exams are over ? And if there are medical reasons for not being able to sit exams, the university ought to take that into account. And skilled treatment of your bulimia, though it may then sart wih some time in hospital, shouldn't usually need 6 months in a rehab program.
I strongly agree with Liza, that 6 months of in-patient rehab is rarely the best idea, and is not a great way to prepare for coping with real-lfe --- while CBT counselling could help achieve exactly that. And absolutely do not go for any rehab that is intensive for however many inpatient months, and then leaves you alone --- it would be CBT and follow0up support that would be crucial.
It is esetial that you recognize the falsity of the idea you are clinging to --- the eating disorder does NOT help you cope in life -- it makes coping with life much more dificult. Maybe it gives you a false sense of coping to be able to so keenly control your eating and vomiting, but that's not actually coping with anything, it's proof of NOT coping.
The age of your fellow students is irrelevant. They have not faced the sort of problems you have, and comparisons are irrelevant. Look at Lisa's example, of someone with an even more complex and difficult conition, who is now doing really well in her studies. Being heathy is the first essential step, then everything else hat is worthwhile can follow that

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Our users say:
Posted by: 007Boer | 2009-06-30

You do need help, but it is much easier (and much cheaper) to get control of yourself with immediate effect. You will need medical assistance to regain your balance, but the motivation and strength of character is already present in every single one of us.

Reply to 007Boer
Posted by: MY GOODNESS | 2009-06-30

I don' t mean to be insensitive, but this is your chance to take control of your own life. Get a grip, make the decision. I have a very debilitating chronic disease, but I managed to graduate while working at the same time, through sheer strength of will and personal drive. Don' t let your illness control your life, because then it will start defining you as a person. If you make an excuse and give up a dream because of your illness, then pretty soon it will start being your reason for giving up all your dreams. Be strong, persevere, you can do it.

Reply to MY GOODNESS
Posted by: Liza | 2009-06-30

I' m 32 and writing exams with 19/20 year olds. And I suffer from rapid-cycling bipolar II. Your health must come first, but I don' t see the need for 6 months live-in rehab. Why can' t you scale down a little on the studies side and see a shrink and CBT therapist as often as possible without being admitted?

I feel that conquering your problems in the protective environment of a rehab does not fully equip you to conquer your problems in a normal, stressful living environment. Thus the chances of a relapse is greater when you return to a normal environment.

Just my 2c worth.
Liza

Reply to Liza
Posted by: help | 2009-06-30

you need to put your health first, get help go to rehab see a doctor etc, dont worry about uni it will always be there - if you dont sort out your problems you might not always be here.

Reply to help

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