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Question
Posted by: Nina | 2010-03-06

Parasite sibling

My friend is an older sibling supporting the younger adult brother financially, the younger brother is financially dependant on him. The younger brother earns minimum wage and has no assets or ambition for that mater. The parents are not involved. The younger brother is happy to receive and takes no responsibility for actions even if he is at fault and is happy to let the older brother take care of the financial impact.

It would seem the older brother is acting as an enabler and would guage it is out of an over developed sense of responsibility.

Where would one look for help in a case like this?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Maybe the younger brother does't NEED any ambition, if he assumes his older brother will sponsor him on a lifelong basis. You are indeed describing an enabler, and need to discuss this issue with him. A counsellor could help him understand such reactions and to chose responses better for himself and his brother

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2010-03-06

Diplomatically point out to your friend that constantly supporting his brother actually stops the brother from growing and maturing as a person.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-03-06

Maybe the younger brother does't NEED any ambition, if he assumes his older brother will sponsor him on a lifelong basis. You are indeed describing an enabler, and need to discuss this issue with him. A counsellor could help him understand such reactions and to chose responses better for himself and his brother

Reply to cybershrink

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