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Question
Posted by: funkyheart | 2010/09/28

out of my mind

I dont love my husband anymore, we had a huge fight last week, he called the cops to through me out in front of my children, who were hystrical. he called me the rudest names ever and then that night he wants sex. i wanted to be sick he made me feel so dirty. i have told him nicely i cant sleep with him because of what was said and done and now he is not talking to me. i want out but we just have moved to cape town and i am earning peanuts. i need his income but we are so unhappy, he is going away on business for a week and we cant wait to have some peace and quiet at home. not walking on egg shell. surely if you love someone you dont feel like this. i dont know what to do

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Whatever is going on between a couple, they should NEVER EVER allow such scenes in front of their frightened children - both of you are to blame for allowing any fight to develop in such a direction. Obviously there are strong and negative feelings between you, but this may not be "falling out of love" rather than part of the offense you both feel anout the fight.
For some men, asking for sex can be seen by them ( yes, incredible as it may seem to others, especially women ) as an attempt to apologise and make good, without actually apologising in words ; or it may just be selfish and oafish behaviour.
Can't you both agree to get into serious marriage counselling when he returns, and you should both have cooled off ?

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Unique | 2010/09/28

LEAVE HIM. I''m telling you now - it very bad for your kids.

Reply to Unique
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/09/28

Whatever is going on between a couple, they should NEVER EVER allow such scenes in front of their frightened children - both of you are to blame for allowing any fight to develop in such a direction. Obviously there are strong and negative feelings between you, but this may not be "falling out of love" rather than part of the offense you both feel anout the fight.
For some men, asking for sex can be seen by them ( yes, incredible as it may seem to others, especially women ) as an attempt to apologise and make good, without actually apologising in words ; or it may just be selfish and oafish behaviour.
Can't you both agree to get into serious marriage counselling when he returns, and you should both have cooled off ?

Reply to cybershrink

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