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Question
Posted by: Ester Harper | 2010/11/26

Opening up or only interested in his sexual pleasure

am involved with a guy that I have slept with on and off and obsessed with for nearly 10 years - although the last few years we have become very close - although he never discusses his feelings towards me - our sexual relationship dominates the relationship and his fettishes have become routine - I dont think he knows how to communicate his feelings I discuss my need to feel wanted and sexy and the impact that I believe it might have on me fulfillng his needs - I dont seem to have the confidence or motivation to dominate him if I dont see the affect I have on him - is it all about sex that we both love or does he really see me?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Apart from the sex, if he won;t discuss feelings - in what ways do you think you have recently "become very close" ? Many people, especially men, have difficulty in expressing their feelings in words, but usually manage to do so in deeds ( other than sexual deeds ). Do you really see him, other than the sex and the opportunity to feel sexy and wanted ?
If that's all you want, it appears to be what you have got - but not likely to become an emotionaly deep and developing relationship

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/11/27

Apart from the sex, if he won;t discuss feelings - in what ways do you think you have recently "become very close" ? Many people, especially men, have difficulty in expressing their feelings in words, but usually manage to do so in deeds ( other than sexual deeds ). Do you really see him, other than the sex and the opportunity to feel sexy and wanted ?
If that's all you want, it appears to be what you have got - but not likely to become an emotionaly deep and developing relationship

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Maria | 2010/11/26

What you seem to have here is a f*ck buddy. If you want emotional involvement as well you will probably have to move on.

Reply to Maria

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