Our expert says:
Of course this was cheating, just in a more convenient form for them both. If even in the first months of marriage, paying attention to his own wife isn't interesting enough for him, he's probably not mature enough to form an adult relationship. Of course you're not being unreasonable. If he refuses to let you see his chats this can't be because they are innocent and charming. And if he is more influenced by his "friend" than his wife, that speaks volumes about his lack of committment to the marriage.
Mariage counselling might have helped, but doesn't sound as though it was long enough or thorough enough - or he just wasn't sufficiently committed to it.
Think about whether there is any sense in remaining committed onl;y on your side, to this kid who is less interested in the real woman he has at his side, than the virtual women he likes to chat to. apparently, he's a virtual man.
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