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Question
Posted by: P | 2011/02/23

On the bus

Yesterday I got on the bus and walked to the back but didn''t sit down. I had my mp3 player on, so I didn''t hear the men behind me asking me if I wanted a seat, but the song finished and then I heard them say " Oh, she has headphones on. Anyway, it doesn''t look like she wants to sit down" , which was followed by giggles. The the bus driver hit the brakes and they said out loud " please don''t stop so fast, we don''t want this beautiful woman in front of us to fall" , and laughed again.

Were they trying to make fun of me? There have been men who said I''m beautiful but people who don''t know me generally assume I''m still a teenager because I''m small. I hope they weren''t trying to ridicule me, but then why the laughs? I wasn''t even responding or looking at them.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Maybe they were flirting, in the clumsy way some men do. And they are laughing at themselves, thinking they might have been clever. I suppose if you were still wearing the headphones, they assumed you woul;dn't hear you, anyway. These were probably men showing off a bit to each other, as some do, and hardly about you at all

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Our users say:
Posted by: Kate | 2011/02/25

Boredom and nothing better to speak about aI guess, they the stupid ones.

Reply to Kate
Posted by: Astounded | 2011/02/24

As we are not the men and were not on the bus we cannot answer your question as to what were the motives for the mens actions.At best we can only guess!
However suicidal thoughts is an area CS could advise on , l suggest you post a new question re this issue.

Reply to Astounded
Posted by: P | 2011/02/24

I know I may sound like a teenager and maybe I still feel like one, always thinking of suicide. I asked this question because when you feel most people find you stupid and someone on a bus laughs like that, you kind of want to know if they meant it in a good way or if they found you stupid too.

Reply to P
Posted by: Kate | 2011/02/24

Hmm It always puzzles me why people who get onto the bus never look to the back if there are empty seats which there usually is, they then stand all the way to their destination which could be over an hour standing... when people at the back try to get their attention to let them know there''s an empty seat for them hey just pretend not to hear. Mostly they listening to their mp3''s but even so one can still hear others with them on or can feel when someone is trying to get their attention.
So most people just leave them standing or people who get on way after them move to the back to find the seat.

Perhaps they were just making fun of you because you chose to stand even though they told you there was a place to sit...
On the other hand they men, they might not have been thinking anything, their mouths sometimes just open and things come out that really makes no sense at all.
Why think so deep into it?
Forget about it already.

Reply to Kate
Posted by: Astounded | 2011/02/24

You may not be a teenager but act like one . This is a non problem, I am astounded that you should want to discuss this with a shrink!

Reply to Astounded
Posted by: Anon | 2011/02/23

Take the headphones off and then worry about them. If you keep them on, you will be ignored and not part of the bus conversation. So my suggestion, dont even smile at them as that will give them more reason to carry on. Turn UP the headphones and act like they are a joke. Older men taking a bus. Doesnt say much

Reply to Anon
Posted by: CC | 2011/02/23

What? Who cares?

Why do you think they have a motive? Men are men...whatever

Reply to CC
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/02/23

Maybe they were flirting, in the clumsy way some men do. And they are laughing at themselves, thinking they might have been clever. I suppose if you were still wearing the headphones, they assumed you woul;dn't hear you, anyway. These were probably men showing off a bit to each other, as some do, and hardly about you at all

Reply to cybershrink

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