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Question
Posted by: Feelings | 2012/05/14

Numb Emotions

Good day,
I am NUMB, I have no emotions either because all the crap that has happened over the last year has made me numb or I just don’ t give a crap or I am too scared to let the emotions go because I cried to much in the past or something …  I am scared that my emotions have gone and that I will become a numb not caring person. This is what has happened in my life the last year:-
1. Parents were in a horrible car accident  mom (71) had brain surgery and is a little weird lately, like Altsheimers.
2. My parents and I are suing the medical doctors who looked after her at the first hospital.
3. My boyfriend’ s daughter was taken away from him when her mother died by the aunt. We see her every second weekend and fighting for custody. Family Advocate knows this is an urgent matter 8 months later we are still waiting for his report.
4. My brother and his family immigrated to Europe. We were close. But if feels like he dropped me and my parents, and left me looking after them, I don’ t mind but it does get to much at times. Especially with my mother’ s guilt trips and her memory loss.
5. The lawyer we went to see first for the custody is suing my boyfriend for payment. We did go to the law society and opened a case against him as per our lawyer.
6. My boyfriend’ s ex-partner that walked out the business is threatening, blackmailing and spread bad rumours about us. It gets so bad that we went to the police station but can’ t do anything as he is threatening us indirectly.
7. Boyfriends business struggling to get off the ground.
8. Moved from my house into a 3times the size rented home that we want to buy. But I changed my mind as the area is becoming a not to safe area any more.
9. Boyfriend’ s oldest daughter confessed she is a drug addict a few months ago and trying not to be.
10. I (45) had a heart issue and now on chronic meds for the rest of my life.
11. Today - My dad is in hospital (79) with heart and Liver failure and Cirrhosis of the liver. He is very very weak.
12. My daughter (13) is in hospital for bronchitis, bladder and kidney infection.
13. My mother is stressed, she can’ t drive because her foot is dead due to the car accident last year but she drives. I am so worried she will make an accident.
14. My boyfriend and our relationship is taking strain but we are still together.
I waited all my life to have a my own real family, and yet it feels like we are cursed. Please just give me advice to feel again and to get rid of the numb feeling and the “ curse” .
Thank you

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Your brother going to Europe may be really great for him, but does indeed evade his responsibilities back here. And any situations that necessarily involve lawyers are always stressful and often unsatisfying. Maybe you can get an interdict against the bf's ex partner to stop him saying bad things and harrassing you - but look for ways to prove he is doing that.
Spme decisions may have been badly timed, for instance with the business not yet prospering, maybe this wasn't the best time to move to a large new house.
Your mother's fitness to drive should be assessed by a doctor, and she could lose her license - but if, for instance, with your father in the hospital, she needs to get around, the rest of you need to make a realistic plan to help her do so without driving.
But let's focus on your main question. The emotional numbness is understandable, and isn't permament. Its often a sort of emotional equivalent to an overloaded electrical circuit blowing a fuse, and may prevent worse overload, and should fade away as individual problems get sorted out

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/05/14

Your brother going to Europe may be really great for him, but does indeed evade his responsibilities back here. And any situations that necessarily involve lawyers are always stressful and often unsatisfying. Maybe you can get an interdict against the bf's ex partner to stop him saying bad things and harrassing you - but look for ways to prove he is doing that.
Spme decisions may have been badly timed, for instance with the business not yet prospering, maybe this wasn't the best time to move to a large new house.
Your mother's fitness to drive should be assessed by a doctor, and she could lose her license - but if, for instance, with your father in the hospital, she needs to get around, the rest of you need to make a realistic plan to help her do so without driving.
But let's focus on your main question. The emotional numbness is understandable, and isn't permament. Its often a sort of emotional equivalent to an overloaded electrical circuit blowing a fuse, and may prevent worse overload, and should fade away as individual problems get sorted out

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