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Question
Posted by: INorOut | 2011-02-04

No more sex

I have been in a relationship with a great guy for the last two years. When we met I was in perfect shape, but I gained alot of weight while we''ve been together, and my sex drive went south. I now find myself not wanting to have sex with him - at all. I starting eating healthier and excercising, loosing a few kjilos, but the sexual desire I had for him, is gone. We dont even make out anymore. Everything else about our relationship is good, I am overall happy and he seems to be too. We go weeks without having sex, and when we do, it is non-penetrative and over in a second. I have started masturbating more, as my sex drive seems to be returning, but I just feel a bit freaked out having sex with my partner. Any suggestions?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

What else has happened while you were together ? Presumably you ate more, and exercised less. Did you become depressed ( which would also explain the loss of libido ) ? Except that you seem to be talking of a loss of sexual desire FOR HIM, rather than an absence of desire itself.
Maybe it'd help most for you to see a counsellor and work towards better understanding this relationship, how it soured, and how you feel about him and indeed about relationships in general

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-02-05

What else has happened while you were together ? Presumably you ate more, and exercised less. Did you become depressed ( which would also explain the loss of libido ) ? Except that you seem to be talking of a loss of sexual desire FOR HIM, rather than an absence of desire itself.
Maybe it'd help most for you to see a counsellor and work towards better understanding this relationship, how it soured, and how you feel about him and indeed about relationships in general

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