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Question
Posted by: Candice | 2010-01-26

No interest

I am married for 38 years.

By husband het no interest in sex for the last 10 years. The last few times we had sex, it was on my initiative.

He has had a bypass and is on various medications.

I am not boosting myself, but I know that I am still an attractive woman and not overweight.

What really hurts me, is that he seems to be very charming to other woman. Sends them emails, sms etc. He is retired so he has time for all this.

Should I just accept this condition
or what do you think?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageAgeing and Sexuality expert

It is so safe to flirt, sms and e mail women when you know you will not be sexual with them. Come home to your own wife who is real , and suddenly you actually have to "perform". You have to walk your talk.
Of course you have a right to still be sexual, to be appreciated as a woman. And of course you have a right to be the recipient of your husband's affections and attentions.
Heart disease and medication to treat it will cause erectile dysfunction and even low sexual desire. Often times men begin to avoid their mates as they know they have sexual dysfunction. Often times men are embarrassed to discuss this with a partner.
I urge you to get your husband to a doctor who will discuss his sexuality with him, provide him with treatment if necessary. then you two need to visit a sex therapist as the best medication in the world cannot get you two to get back to sex again. The longer time that goes by the more difficult it is to make love again. Go before your resentment, self image and anger boil over.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

1
Our users say:
Posted by: Ageing and Sexuality Expert | 2010-01-30

It is so safe to flirt, sms and e mail women when you know you will not be sexual with them. Come home to your own wife who is real , and suddenly you actually have to "perform". You have to walk your talk.
Of course you have a right to still be sexual, to be appreciated as a woman. And of course you have a right to be the recipient of your husband's affections and attentions.
Heart disease and medication to treat it will cause erectile dysfunction and even low sexual desire. Often times men begin to avoid their mates as they know they have sexual dysfunction. Often times men are embarrassed to discuss this with a partner.
I urge you to get your husband to a doctor who will discuss his sexuality with him, provide him with treatment if necessary. then you two need to visit a sex therapist as the best medication in the world cannot get you two to get back to sex again. The longer time that goes by the more difficult it is to make love again. Go before your resentment, self image and anger boil over.

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