Posted by: Newly wed | 2009-04-14

Newly married blues?

Hi Doc...
I' ve just got married and I' m feeling pretty low... even depressed. It has absolutely nothing to do with the man I married, he is truly wonderful... my sould mate and love of my life. I just feel deflated somehow. Perhaps months of preparation and looking forward to a honeymoon - now that' s it' s all over I feel down? I just can' t put my finger on it... I have a perpetual knot in my stomach and feel really depressed... Does this sometimes happen after getting married? I' m anxious about keeping the marriage alive for the rest of our lives, anxious about the sex always being good, anxious that we' ll love each other forever, anxious that we' ll be in the stats with so many men/women being adulterous... I never usually worry about these kinds of things...

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Our expert says:
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I really think these days people are encouaged to make rather too much of a wedding, and it becomes less about the decision of two nice people to commit to remaining together, and more abou an orgy of Planning, menus, table gifts, floral decorations, etc., and just as one feels oddly flat after completing an exam, one can fel flat after the pressures of a wedding are over. And maybe you're a bit too anxious about doing everything right, to be able to just relax and enjoy it. If problems mount, consider couples counselling so you can sort things out workin together

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Our users say:
Posted by: Bee | 2009-04-15

Hi! I' ve been married for 7 months now and girl - your thoughts are totaaly normal! I felt exactly the same. Society tells us that its the best time etc etc and in a way it is, but its also a huge ajustment and takes time. I remember feeling shy while with husband - like all of a sudden its different. will pass soon, don' t worry! xxx

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