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Question
Posted by: ANON | 2010/09/13

NEW RELATIONSHIPS

I recently started dating this guy... and already I see problems. Maybe it’ s me, I don’ t know, maybe it’ s because the relationship is new I am not sure.
The thing is he is very clingy. We will spend the whole day together and then he will call me at night telling me that he wants to see me because he misses me. This is a bit hectic for me because I am someone who enjoys having my own space. The end result is that he begs and I give in. He will just turn up at my flat and luckily we have security that will not allow anyone in unless you are signing them in. He calls me up to 15 times a day and I have not called him once. Something is really bothering me but I cannot put my finger on it. I know that everyone has skeletons in their closet and that his past is just that the past. He however makes it out that he is this perfect person. Is there something wrong with me or do I really have a concern here. I don’ t see why a couple should see each other every single day. It’ s just too much. He tells me all day that he loves me and we are not even dating a month, he asked me if I loved him and I said that you can’ t just say those words without meaning it and you have to work toward it. I really can’ t see a future with this guy and really don’ t know what to do, or am I just being a bit hasty.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

First impressions are worth paying attention to. They may not be infallibly right, but can be very relevant. He does indeed sound clingy - to a marked and alarming degree. 15 calls a day, etc., is truly pathetic and if this is how it is at the very beginning, imagine what this could develop into ? Indeed, though you might very understandably decide to end this sickly relationship, he may be hard to end things with, and you would need to be very cautious about how you went about it. You don't need a stalker ( which is what he is already very close to ) or worse.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Ted | 2010/09/13

He sound like someone I know but mine was phoning may be 5 times a day and you should be always make sure u answer all his calls even at work. Where does he live?

Reply to Ted
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/09/13

First impressions are worth paying attention to. They may not be infallibly right, but can be very relevant. He does indeed sound clingy - to a marked and alarming degree. 15 calls a day, etc., is truly pathetic and if this is how it is at the very beginning, imagine what this could develop into ? Indeed, though you might very understandably decide to end this sickly relationship, he may be hard to end things with, and you would need to be very cautious about how you went about it. You don't need a stalker ( which is what he is already very close to ) or worse.

Reply to cybershrink

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