Our expert says:
Yes this can be normal. Some women struggle to reach orgasm and in fact 70% of women reach orgasm on only every 2nd or 3rd sexual encounter with a partner. In order for a woman to reach orgasm, she needs to communicate clearly with her partner about what feels good. There are a number of reasons why women aren't able to reach orgasm, including: inadequate knowledge of their sexual response, fear of 'letting go' and what this might mean (e.g. some women are afraid of losing control, some fear that they might wee), side effect of some medication (e.g. antidepressants), inadequate arousal, tiredness, etc. Although some women prefer intercourse stimulation, it is not necessary for an erect penis to be in the vagina in order for women to experience orgasm. It generally results from a build-up of body tension through direct or indirect stimulation of the clitoris. Stimulation of the clitoris through self-pleasuring or a partner’s touch, oral-genital stimulation or perhaps the use of a vibrator may result in orgasm. Some women never experience orgasm through intercourse alone, the addition of some direct clitoral touching with finger or vibrator usually makes orgasm possible. You may find that oral stimulation works best. Most important is to relax, enjoy the journey and do not become too hung up on the destination.
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