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Question
Posted by: TRUST | 2010/02/22

NENE

PLS HELP ME

I need help,i am struggling to trust my man of 4yrs after he cheated, got caught and he admitted and apologises. I think he is trying to fix what he did to my feelings but i can beleive him for a while and and not trust him again.

how do i begin to trust him fully agian. how long does or will it take for one to forgive somone??????????

i dont know whether i still love him or i am used to have him around because now i dont even have sexually feelings for him after sex i am left with pains on my vagina. i told him abt this and he said its ok when the time is right we will do it again. Doc do u think i should see a phsycologist or both of us??

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Liza's just exactly right. There's no exact recipe for how long it takes before you are able to trust someone safely - sometimes the answer is "never", sometimes it takes years. Be checked with a gynae for STD, and maybe there's some separate cause for the pain you have been experiencing. Marriage counselling may then be worth it, not necessarily to keep you together, but to move towards being able to make a more sensible decision about that.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Liza | 2010/02/22

First you''re going to need to find out how much there is to forgive. Hope you''ve gone and had yourself tested for STD''s. This is VERY important. Then you know how much there is to forgive. If you still want to make it work, couples counseling would be a good idea.

Good Luck
Liza

Reply to Liza
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/02/22

Liza's just exactly right. There's no exact recipe for how long it takes before you are able to trust someone safely - sometimes the answer is "never", sometimes it takes years. Be checked with a gynae for STD, and maybe there's some separate cause for the pain you have been experiencing. Marriage counselling may then be worth it, not necessarily to keep you together, but to move towards being able to make a more sensible decision about that.

Reply to cybershrink

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