Posted by: Noenoe | 2009-01-26

Negative sex drive

i have a negative association towards sex. Had very diverse adaptions towards sex. Mother was an alcoholic and made sex out to be ugly at age 11. Saw an explicit porn clip at age 9 and was totally put off at the idea of sex. Grew up and tried to put this past me. Then as luck would have it i fell pregnant at 18. My mother kept on telling me and others what a whore i was. I married the guy and he cheated on me. Got divorced and is now happily married to an absolute great guy. It' s the sex. I find him sexy and want to have sex but i don' t get aroused or even bother initiating sex. Problem is psycological not physical. I have cosidered hypnotism to reverse the initial perception of sex

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Noenoe, it sounds as though you need some professional support to manage some of the negative associations...HOwever, the fact that you feel desire to be sexual with your new husband is positive and perhaps one of the things you can do is to try to focus on your body and your body's response (e.g. what feels good, tell him what feels nice or how to move to enhance the sensation) in order to assist yourself with arousal...another option might be to try a lubricant or sex toy to facilitate arousal if you already have the desire. Hypnosis may work - I am haven't read much by the way of evidence for this, but that doesn't mean it won't work! If you do go down this route, try to find a registered professional with accreditation in hypnotherapy. You could identify such a person either via your GP, the internet, HPCSA or PsySSA (psychological society of South Africa). Alternatively, try to identify a therapist (psychologist, sexologist, or counsellor) in your locality who has an interest in/experience with such matters.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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