Posted by: Anon | 2010-01-27

Need to chnage my thought pattern

I need to start by saying that I love my fiance  he is the most wonderful and generous lover and person in general. Our libidos are quite different - his being much higher than mine but we seem to be dealing with that ok. The problem is that I made sex all about him: I tried to give it to him as often as he needed it, and if we couldn' t have sex I' d try other ways to satisfy him. Don' t get me wrong, he is the best lover I have ever had and always makes sure I am satisfied first. It was my choice to make sex about him, and now I seem to resent him for it. I hardly ever want to have sex now, and despite all the right things he does I just want it to be quick and am not bothered whether I cum or not - which is difficult for him to understand. We have spoken about this but neither one can come up with any answers  there is nothing he is doing wrong. There was a time when he wanted to try something new almost every day, and it got to the point where after a 2 hour session he would already start talking about the nect thing he wanted to try and I felt that no matter how far I went or what I did he would never be satisfied. I told him how this made me feel and he immediately stopped  but I think somehow I' ve gotten stuck there. How do I change the way I think about sex? How can I bring the passion back from my side (its never lacking from his)?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

It sounds that both you and your fiance need to learn a lot about what sex means to both a man and a woman. You both are not on the same 'wave-length'. You are dealing with questions of being honest with each other, expectations, understanding each other, explorring your own sexuality and what you want out of sex. The best person to help you with this will be a sex therapist / psychologist.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Anon | 2010-01-28

To Mr G, we' ve been together for four years, we are both in our early thirties.

To Anon2, grow up.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: xxx | 2010-01-28

You said it is all about him? Don' t you have any fantasies that you would like to explore? I think he is happy and excited about your willingness to explore his fantasies, but you must try some of your own and make it about what you both want. Get creative and your desire will return!

Reply to xxx
Posted by: anon2 | 2010-01-27

dont kid yrself, u dont luv him, dump him and get another,
let him find someonelse

Reply to anon2
Posted by: Mr G | 2010-01-27

How old are you and for how long have you been dating and engaged?

Reply to Mr G

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