Our expert says:
It sounds like you have a discrepancy that needs to be managed and a compromise reached. I would not recommend that you do anything TO him or GIVE him anything to meet your needs, just as I wouldn't if a man wrote the same about his female partner! I would recommend that the two of you discuss this as a different set preferences and explore how best both needs can be met. It may be that you could benefit from a professional facilitating this process because it sounds like you also are both tending to blame the other...this could easily result in conflict and damaged egos!
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