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Question
Posted by: Kim K | 2010/10/13

need advise - on a seriouse note

I have been dating this guy for over a year - things have really become seriouse, i love him, he loves me! Our sex life was great and still is except the fact that he is lazy and suddenly cannot keep up with my expectations! we used to have sex 6 times a week (once a day at least), now it''s gone to once or twice a week! Now i am very frustrated - i''ve spoken to him but still does not pull up his socks! His work is not stressful, he is just lazy and i am getting tired of this and i wonder if i even want to get married to this guy as i do not want to cheat!!!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

It will be good if the two mof you discuss your levels of sexual desire and find a compromise. It is also important to note, that a good relationship can decrease the need for sex for the sake of having sex. It gets a deeper meaning. Thus either his sexdrive is lower than yours or he experiences it in a different meaningful manner. If the two of you can not come to some compromise with regard to your needs, phone the SASHA helpline for the contact details of a professional – 0860 100 262. Deidre -SASHA

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Anon Guy | 2010/10/14

I have noticed that most of the posting were deleted. Kim should you just need a friend to chat to you can mail me -
andrea765765 at gmail dot com

Reply to Anon Guy
Posted by: Anon 4 this | 2010/10/13

I have the same situation with my wife-never ever interested in sex.I have bought lubes,toys,pills etc etc but nothing helps.I doubt whether things will ever change.

Reply to Anon 4 this
Posted by: dogwatch | 2010/10/13

Kim this anon guy is horny guy his trying to lure you untill you agree to chart off the forum.

Reply to dogwatch
Posted by: Kim K | 2010/10/13

I''m 31 and he''s 35 so i think we''ve reached our peak! He used to drink alcohol and he was very active so there''s no ways that i will encourage him to go back to his drinking ways!! he is so lazy, even when i offer to be on top - he just doesn''t seem interested and i know that he is not having an affair! and yes i''ve told him how this is affecting our relationship and i''ve threatened and only then will i get sum - can you believe it?!?

Reply to Kim K
Posted by: XXX | 2010/10/13

I have never heard of a guy that is too lazy for sex! You need to chat to him again and tell him how serious you are

Reply to XXX
Posted by: anon007 | 2010/10/13

How old are you guys?

Reply to anon007
Posted by: Kim K | 2010/10/13

well, two-stone... he fulfils me in a way that i feel like i belong, i feel loved and yes sexually too, but that''s about it! his strong point is sex so if he is not performing i don''t see any other way that he can fill that gap!

Reply to Kim K
Posted by: two-stone | 2010/10/13

It will not improve unfortunately, Kim. Are you sure he is not seeing someone else? As sex is obviously a very big part of your make-up/relationship, I think you should move on. You did not mention that he fulfills you in all other ways, so, to me, it is a relationship which revolves around sex. Without that, I would guess there is not much else. Leave.

Reply to two-stone
Posted by: Anon Guy | 2010/10/13

Leave the guy Kim - he cant keep up.

Reply to Anon Guy
Posted by: sexologist | 2010/10/13

It will be good if the two mof you discuss your levels of sexual desire and find a compromise. It is also important to note, that a good relationship can decrease the need for sex for the sake of having sex. It gets a deeper meaning. Thus either his sexdrive is lower than yours or he experiences it in a different meaningful manner. If the two of you can not come to some compromise with regard to your needs, phone the SASHA helpline for the contact details of a professional – 0860 100 262. Deidre -SASHA

Reply to sexologist

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