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Question
Posted by: chris | 2011/02/03

my wife says she does not love me anymore help!

I was unattentive the last 2 years due to financial and work stress . I kept all the worries to myself to protect my family but this was a huge mistake as my wife now has reached the point where she wants me to leave. This is a big shock to me as I did not think it was so serious and we had time to resolve. How do I fix this as I love my wife and kids to bits. How do I change her mind as I am prepared to do anything to proof I am still the person she fell in love with

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Spouses, maybe especially women, often fail to recognize that financial and work stress can cause great problems for a working spouse, especially if they themselves stay at home, and don't appreciate that part of the world. It is understandable to try to keep all the worries to yourself, but in fact I think it is important to share them with one's spouse - not as a continuous grumble, but keeping them in the picture.
Try to persuade her to join you in marriage counselling as soon as pratical, so you can each learn to udnderstand each other better, especvially as the problems you describe sound very soluble. And tell her very clearly how much you love her and the child, and how sincerley you want to solve these problems, working together with her.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: C | 2011/02/04

Definately watch Fire Proof

Reply to C
Posted by: :-( :-( :-( | 2011/02/04

forgot to say that''s also what I told my husband, and I was serious about it when I said " i just don''t love you anymore"  its because he was not showing me that attention I needed and at the same time I was getting the emotional attention I needed from other people via chatting on facebook, skype etc. etc. etc.

This sort of thing gives a women courage and the feeling that they can get love elsewhere if they not getting it from you.

You are going to have to work hard at it Chris, but if you want to save your marriage there is hope.

Reply to :-( :-( :-(
Posted by: :-( :-( :-( | 2011/02/04

Sorry to hear that this is happening to you!
Maybe think of setting up a dinner table with possibly her favorite meal and try and tell her what you feeling and what you propose, speak from your heart and tell her you would appreciate it if you can have a few minutes where she just sits and listens, then speak out everything from your heart even if you need to type it down or write it down and have it with you if you get stuck on stuff while chatting, Also tell her you don''t expect her to give answers but if she would think things over how great we were and can still be.

Once you are done talking give her some time don''t pressure her into answers etc. etc. Finish your dinner and do things to show her that you want her and your children in your life.

I know this may sound stupid but it has happened to me where I wanted my husband gone, so I could start living my life and exploring other things.

He approached everything so differently, and was gentle and loving at the same time - he watched that Fire Proof Movie over and over and over and over again - and just because the things he did and how he did them differently is what won my heart over and now we are as happy as anything again. Oh and by the way we also had financial and other major issues to deal with.

Good Luck Chris
Remember do things that you may think are abnormal to for your wife cause you never do these things - but at the end she will love you more for it.

WATCH FIRE PROOF seriously

Reply to :-( :-( :-(
Posted by: Anon wife | 2011/02/03

Shame Chris I feel for you as you sound really sincere, I wish my hubby would keep some of his work issues to himself so I can have a little bit of peace of mind sometimes. I hope she comes around.

Reply to Anon wife
Posted by: weeeee | 2011/02/03

Print your post out and give 2 yr wife.

Reply to weeeee
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/02/03

Spouses, maybe especially women, often fail to recognize that financial and work stress can cause great problems for a working spouse, especially if they themselves stay at home, and don't appreciate that part of the world. It is understandable to try to keep all the worries to yourself, but in fact I think it is important to share them with one's spouse - not as a continuous grumble, but keeping them in the picture.
Try to persuade her to join you in marriage counselling as soon as pratical, so you can each learn to udnderstand each other better, especvially as the problems you describe sound very soluble. And tell her very clearly how much you love her and the child, and how sincerley you want to solve these problems, working together with her.

Reply to cybershrink

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