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Question
Posted by: Anri | 2012-01-24

my story

Dear prof Simpson

I feel so ashamed and embarrassed by writing this to you. I actually wish it was private and not on a site.

I was raped while I was 4 months pregnant, in my own home in a security complex. I went home early, because I felt sick.
They left after taking nothing else than my body and soul. That day after it happened I sat there for a vie minutes not knowing what to do. Should I phone my husband or the police. I decided to tell nobody... The reason for this is because I know for a fact that my husband will not be strong enough to handle this and my mother had a heart attack a vie months earlier. I went to a doctor not my own dr to get the ARV''s. I do go for blood tests regularly and so far I am clean. I told my husband that we cannot be intimate because of my pregnancy and complications.

My little beautifull girl is born and I feel a strange feeling about her. A feeling of anger. And I know it is not her fault. I just cannot help myselff.
I went to a psig dr and I couldn''t tell him either. I talked a lot except about the real problem. The doctor put me on Epitec for bipolar 2, which I still didn''t take.

I want to get a divorce just to excuse myself from intimacy. I wanted to see a fortune teller to see whether she see something positive. But after you gave me your opinion I decided not to. I am a total mess an I hate being here.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

That you were raped is awful, but not your fault. That you decided tgo tell nobody was probably really unwise, but it's a decision quite a few people in such a position do make. Your husband COULD handle such a situation, and your mother while being upset would probably also not be damaged by the news - both are more likely to be upset that you chose not to tell them or allow them to help you.
You need an expert opinion on the issue of HIV risk, but it sounds as though fportunately you were not infected, and if this is now sure, there would be no need to avoid sexual relations with your husband.
You ABSOLUTELY MUST see a psychologist ( not a GP ) and tell him everything about what happened - no doc worth a cent would think any the less of you, and they would be able to help you - but onl if they knew what was actually happening. I don't see any reason to belive you have any form of bipolar disorder or that drugs for that would help you at all.
You don't need a fortune teller, either - you will be able to make your own good fortune. But you need to see a psychologist to work through the trauma of the rape and to unravel the unhelpful ways you have deal with it so far. You WILL be able to get through this and may even emerge stronger than previously. But please stop blaming yourself for what horrible other people did to you, and get the help you need and deserve.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: Anri | 2012-01-26

Hi Bron

No, I was to pathetic to do anything. I know it was a stupid decision, but I decided to save my family.

Thanks for your kind words. Please look after yourself. I know you are going through some trouble as well. This is the time to think about YOURSELVE. You owe it to yourselve.

Take care
I am on study leave. Will chat again.

Reply to Anri
Posted by: Bron | 2012-01-25

Did you open up a case? Dont let them ruin your life by letting them get away with this? The security should have records of who entered the complex and what date and sometimes take registration numbers down.
Dont give them more opportunity to ruin you - it wasnt your fault. You have been violated and need to find a remedy. Speak to a rape counsellor and get medication for depression so you can be calm and try to find justice for your spirit. You have a gift from God, who survived the ordeal! You are blessed to have her, you need to help yourself so you can help her too. My prayers go out to you.

Reply to Bron
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012-01-25

That you were raped is awful, but not your fault. That you decided tgo tell nobody was probably really unwise, but it's a decision quite a few people in such a position do make. Your husband COULD handle such a situation, and your mother while being upset would probably also not be damaged by the news - both are more likely to be upset that you chose not to tell them or allow them to help you.
You need an expert opinion on the issue of HIV risk, but it sounds as though fportunately you were not infected, and if this is now sure, there would be no need to avoid sexual relations with your husband.
You ABSOLUTELY MUST see a psychologist ( not a GP ) and tell him everything about what happened - no doc worth a cent would think any the less of you, and they would be able to help you - but onl if they knew what was actually happening. I don't see any reason to belive you have any form of bipolar disorder or that drugs for that would help you at all.
You don't need a fortune teller, either - you will be able to make your own good fortune. But you need to see a psychologist to work through the trauma of the rape and to unravel the unhelpful ways you have deal with it so far. You WILL be able to get through this and may even emerge stronger than previously. But please stop blaming yourself for what horrible other people did to you, and get the help you need and deserve.

Reply to cybershrink

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