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Question
Posted by: HAPINESS | 2010/05/07

MY HUSBAND

I am facing a rough time im my marriage right now. My husband has done so many things that are so hurtful to me. I''ve managed to forgive him and I''ve been trying to move on with my life but unable to trust him again.
Recently, I calle my friend who''s a male friend and I wanted his advice(from a friend''s point of view. He heard me talking to him, and he asked me bout it, I told him and he was so angry with me he even strangled me and I was unable to breath. He said I was cheating on him with that person I call a friend.
I''ve tried to prove that I am not cheating on him and I even did a Lie Detection Test to prove, I called him while I was doing it and it showed that indeed I was not cheating on him. I have apologised to him 4 so many times for talking to my F, but he is making a big issue bout it.
Now I have realised that he''s so manipulative, He is capitalizing bout my mistakes and when I remind him bout his he ignores them &  enphasises on mine.
I thought in marriage we are supposed to forgive each other no matter what. He''s been doing so many things in his past and he''s still doing some of them but I never gave him hard time, I always 4rgive him so that we should move on....But now he makes me feel bad and he never apologises 4 his mistakes, unlike me..............Now in our 4 years of marriage, I''ve dicovered this side of him that is so scary, I donno how to deal with it and I am scared.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sounds like an abusive relationship - have you tried talking with a group that helps abused women, such as POWA ? That strangling incident sounds serious and his violence could get worse - ensure your own safety, first.
When someone is pathologically jealous - that is, where the jealoust arises from his own internal problems rather than from objective external evidence, then he is gnerally not satisfied by any ordinary evidence.
And it is also quite common that a guy who is cheating, makes a big fuss about suspecting his wife, to divert her attenton from himself.
Sometimes, by forgiving too easily and too often,you have taught him to assume that you will always forgive anything.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: Mary | 2010/05/08

He is taking you for granted .

Reply to Mary
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/05/07

Sounds like an abusive relationship - have you tried talking with a group that helps abused women, such as POWA ? That strangling incident sounds serious and his violence could get worse - ensure your own safety, first.
When someone is pathologically jealous - that is, where the jealoust arises from his own internal problems rather than from objective external evidence, then he is gnerally not satisfied by any ordinary evidence.
And it is also quite common that a guy who is cheating, makes a big fuss about suspecting his wife, to divert her attenton from himself.
Sometimes, by forgiving too easily and too often,you have taught him to assume that you will always forgive anything.

Reply to cybershrink

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