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Question
Posted by: employee | 2010/07/29

my colleague passed away yesterday in road accident

hi, i am having a problem to deal with my colleague''s death yesterday, she was on her way to training in another city, when the car just rolled and rolled and my colleague died on way to hospital, this is difficult as i sit next to her in office and now this is going to make it more worse for me to go to work as she was a dear dear friend as well, we shared so much....
please help me find a way to deal with this...

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Such a sudden and unexpected loss of someone you knew, is never easy. But it won't remain overwhelmingly disturbing to you for long. Seeing a counsellor could help, and indeed, it would be sensible for management to have someone made available as there may well be more people than you that feel similarly shocked and upset.
You know she would want you to continue with your work, and would not want you to feel too deeply bad, but rather work towards remembering all the things that made her dear to you and others.

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Anne | 2010/07/31

Bee no one can grieve over the weekend and feel better by Monday. Your reply is rather senseless and tactless to say the least. Grieving has no time limit.

Dear Employee,

CS is right. You need to call in a trauma counsellor to counsel everyone. Also by talking about her and your feelings of shock, disbelief and hurt etc. will help. Perhaps you can send flowers and a note of condolences to her family and by being supportive towards them will help you as well in your own grieving. Also if you are able to attend her funeral will enable some closure. As human beings we need rituals eg. funeral/memorial service. Everyone gets together with the family to share their grief and pain and support and comfort them. Condolences to her family and also wish you all the best. Do something in her memory, am sure her spirit will be around those who cared for her.

May you be comforted in your grief.

Reply to Anne
Posted by: Bee | 2010/07/30

This is such a terrible thing that happened and I feel so sorry for you. I would also be extremely upset. I think its a good thing that its weekend so you at least have two days to grieve and feel better on Monday. Allow yourself to feel sad.

Reply to Bee
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/07/29

Such a sudden and unexpected loss of someone you knew, is never easy. But it won't remain overwhelmingly disturbing to you for long. Seeing a counsellor could help, and indeed, it would be sensible for management to have someone made available as there may well be more people than you that feel similarly shocked and upset.
You know she would want you to continue with your work, and would not want you to feel too deeply bad, but rather work towards remembering all the things that made her dear to you and others.

Reply to cybershrink

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