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Question
Posted by: Pale | 2011/12/20

My child cries all the time

Hi Doc,

I don''t even know if you are the right person to ask but I have a 2 year old that cries all the time. She has been like this since she was born. Everything makes her cry. I now don''t know what to do seriously, she gets on my nerve and I just want to shut her up.
I have started to just let her cry until she stops. She will throw herself on the floor, bang her head on the wall or even run around the house or yard screaming her lungs out.
Last night she was crying because I was eating she says...like I don''t understand that at all. She had had her dinner already and did not want to eat with me.
What could be wrong with her? How can I help her see that she will not get what she wants just because she cries for it? What is wrong with me? I give her all my attention, in fact she is the center of my life. This is my first child and I don''t think I will ever ever have another child again!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Romany's really on form today ! I agree. Its unusual for a child to cry so much from birth, and there are indeed some possible medical causes for such chronic pain or iritability, and a paediatrician could be a good way of checking.
Otherwise there are also major and common psychological causes for chronic crying, especially in this situaton where it sounds like what I call Interpersonal Crying - when she is crying AT you, rather than on her own ; when it is a social demonstration of frustration or anger more than sorrow. And then a child psychologist could be really helpful.
And if it is possible for you to arrange a break as suggested, both for your own benefit and to see how she behaves when with a different person, that would help you and could be revealing.

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Pale | 2011/12/20

Thank you I will post the question with the paed as well!

Reply to Pale
Posted by: Romany | 2011/12/20

You should post your question to the Paediatrician on this site.
As she has been crying since she was born, as you say, there must be a medical reason.
On the other hand, YOU need a break. Can you not leave her with a granny or aunt or something for a day or 2? This will give you a break and you can also establish if she cries all the time when you are not present as well?

Reply to Romany
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/12/20

Romany's really on form today ! I agree. Its unusual for a child to cry so much from birth, and there are indeed some possible medical causes for such chronic pain or iritability, and a paediatrician could be a good way of checking.
Otherwise there are also major and common psychological causes for chronic crying, especially in this situaton where it sounds like what I call Interpersonal Crying - when she is crying AT you, rather than on her own ; when it is a social demonstration of frustration or anger more than sorrow. And then a child psychologist could be really helpful.
And if it is possible for you to arrange a break as suggested, both for your own benefit and to see how she behaves when with a different person, that would help you and could be revealing.

Reply to cybershrink

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